Mopey Monday.

I put myself under self-imposed lock-up this week. I am a nuisance and annoyance to everybody including myself lately, which does putting myself under lock up with myself sound a bit contradictory. But then again other people seem to bring it out in me., so if it is just me and my scarves I may be fine. Lock-up it is till I get too bored or the 5-HTP kicks in, whichever comes first. I will however say the 5-HTP has a small chance only. A chance as long as it would take 2 bottles of Pinot Noir to better my mood, which I could have bought instead from the money I spend on 30 capsules.
If you are now curious to know why I am in such a kak mood lately...I guess reading my diary would shine some light on it. It’s other people though who bring it out in me. Here are the Top Five culprits of recent note:

No. ¹

Me, answering the phone: MM Production, Annika speaking.
Person calling: Hi, who is this?
Me: MM Production.
Person calling: Eh, ja, I actually meant who you are.

Am I the only person who considers this a tad bit rude? I mean, really?

No. ²

Person steps of the elevator in front of you, stops and looks around. Always.

No. ³

Car stops in the middle of the road. 10 seconds later. I honk. 5 seconds later. I honk again. 2 seconds later.

Me (yelling): Are you fucking kidding me?
Random man on the sidewalk: Don’t shout at him, he is a learner.

“Dear random man on the sidewalk, just because he has a big L on your car doesn’t mean he is in fact a learner. And if he really is a learner, shouldn’t he learn to drive without being on the phone first. Believe me, it is much easier and he will be able to start his car much faster. And why do you care anyhow? Let me yell in peace. Sincerely.”

Not sure who was the person annoying me more in this scenario was.

No. ⁴

The salesperson at Woolworths who didn’t know what flour (“Flowers?” Come on now, by accent is not that bad) is and therefore couldn’t tell me where to find it. Still not when we were standing in front of it.

No. ⁵

My upstairs neighbours morphing into elephants and dancing Samba. Surely there is no other explanation why they managed to wake me two nights in a row at 04h00 with stomping noises. Unless they are like our upstairs neighbours in New York who were in fact having sex. We all went upstairs to complain and unfortunately interrupted them in the process. Hehe. Karma...

The only thing these days that is currently cheering me up and in fact makes me giggle and not grumpy (besides the teacup pig) is my new found blog love The Bloggess and Google. Apparently if you type the beginning of a random question or statement into Google, even more random questions or statements come up. I actually have never tried that before, but in the name of research for a good laugh I did. What did I learn? Google is even more presumptuous than the Frenchman I realized. I type in ... i love ... waiting for something hilarious to pop up. What option do I get? ...i love you in French... Thanks for rubbing it in, Google!

P.S. If you type i hate, you will get i hate my husband for example. It kind of made me sad to think that someone hates their husband and is asking Google for advice on, I don’t know, get rid of him?

P.P.S. This is highly addictive – i want managed to get me i want to marry my mother. No comment.